Freedom!

I took back my life this week. I'm not the first person nor will I be the last to do so. I quit a job that no longer served me, that I no longer enjoyed and just let it go.

It feels amazing! I know it's not something for everyone. It's been at the very least 2 years in the making of an idea to leave this job. I kept talking myself out of it. Kept telling myself all the reasons why I couldn't leave or make a change in my life and I kept going. I kept feeling worse and worse health wise. My anxiety was through the roof and I just about stopped sleeping.

After one final confrontation with my manager I called out sick the next day. I was sick, very sick. I didn't sleep that night at all. My people pleaser self was so upset that no matter what I did to fix things it didn't work. The only thing they wanted was for me to stay longer than I was and work more days and I couldn't do it. My body is already burned out. I needed the time off to recharge just to get through the next week of work. There was no way I could work more than I was. At some point I would just stop functioning all together. After taking a 5 day weekend. I finally decided enough was enough.

I was more important than this job. My health was more important than this job. So I decided to leave it behind. It took me two more days before I was actually able to go in and tell them I wasn't coming back. I slept that night when I got home for about 5 hours straight I was up for about an hour and then I slept another 2 hours. I felt wonderful the next morning. That was the most sleep I'd had in a row in a long time.

Is this something everyone can do, maybe not. It was something I chose to do though. It was something I needed to do.

Now I get to figure out how I want to spend the second half of my life. What do I really want to do with myself and there's nothing in my way to figure things out now.

To live is a very big adventure! I'm going to go and find my adventure!